But I guess the answer is supposed to be Jesus
"The sea rises, the light fails, lovers cling to each other, and children cling to us. The moment we cease to hold each other, the moment we break faith with one another, the sea engulfs us and the light goes out.” - James Arthur Baldwin
I was surfing my Face-book page today, reading the posts from my very diverse group of friends. There was a post about the upcoming Inaugural address and how a pastor has been uninvited because of his stance on homosexuality, one post was depicting a pro-life poster, another was highlighting a pro-choice poster, one was sharing a pro-republican link, and another was sharing a pro-democratic link.
As I said, my friends are diverse. But the thing that struck me about all the posts, was that they tended to lead me to conversations that were one-sided. The contributors seemed to have arrived with their answer pre-determined before they even heard any question.
One
of my favorite church jokes is the one about the Sunday School teacher who was
teaching a lesson about being prepared and working diligently. She wanted
to use squirrels as an example of being well prepared.
She started the
lesson by saying, ”I’m going to describe something, and I want you to
raise your hand when you know what it is.” The children were excited to
show her what they knew and leaned forward eagerly.
“I’m
thinking of something that lives in trees (pause) and eats
nuts (pause)…” No hands went up. “It can be gray or brown (pause)
and it has a long bushy tail (pause)…” The children
looked around the room at each other, but still no one raised a hand. “It
chatters (pause) and sometimes it flips its tail when it’s excited (pause)…”
Finally
one little boy shyly raised his hand. The teacher breathed a sigh of relief and
said, “Okay, Billy. What do you think it is?”
“Well,”
said Billy, “it sure sounds like a squirrel, but I guess the answer’s supposed
to be Jesus.”
"But I guess the answer's supposed to be Jesus"
In today's world of ever changing values and vanities we face hard questions that demand we come together or fall apart. But too often our response is to offer the "Jesus" answer. The standard answer that we think is the only one our group is supposed to use.
So many of the challenges we face today could compel us to come together as a society, but instead they seem to polarize us. Lovers divorce in the face of disaster, children are abandoned by adults rather than embraced. Communities throw accusations calculated to divide, politics is about being right rather than being effective, so often it seems people are confusing character with conviction. Just because you disagree with me doesn't make you a bad person.
I hear the indictment of America's politicians from American society and I really wonder if these committed men and women could be as immoral as the TV commentators suppose? Can war heroes really be such scrooge-like scoundrels? Can community activists really be ravening monsters?
Does an NRA bumper sticker always have to represent an evil Conservative expressing a callous culpability to children dying? Or vice-versa, does a Planned Parenthood bumper sticker always have to reveal an evil Liberal endorsing a callous culpability to children dying?
When I decide that despite the description I am presented with, the answer must be pre-determined, then I'm like Billy in the classroom, feeling confused because it sure sounds like a squirrel but I guess the answer's supposed to be Jesus.....
Perhaps if we didn't enter a conversation already knowing the answer we might be willing to listen to the description before deciding what the answer might be?
Just a thought....
Great blog! However it seems to me that we should go into conversations being extremely confident in what we believe. It is one's belief and should be held onto as such. (And if someone doesn't hold that firmly to his or her conviction then he or she shouldn't pretend to.) But we also must drive for respect of the other and seek to understand their plaiting as well. Otherwise are we not saying that my answer isn't that important, or I haven't taken the time to actually work through what a think?
ReplyDeleteTo enter a conversation without declaring you already know the answer, doesn't mean you lack firm beliefs. But it does suggest you are willing to review the subject with virgin eyes. No matter how strong my beliefs are, it hardly justifies me having the answer before I've heard the question.
ReplyDeleteMy beliefs are not so mature that nothing can be added to them by new information. Neither are they unchangeable so perhaps you might convince me I am wrong? How else can one be converted?
Why does a willingness to listen, a propensity to ponder divergent opinions, appear as declaring the person lacks a personal foundational belief system?
ReplyDeleteYou have known me for over six months, do you think I have deeply held Christian beliefs?
If I had allowed my firmly held beliefs to remain unchallenged, then I could never have left Northern Ireland's cultural version of Christianity.
I find it incredibly difficult to "hear" the opposing view, when I carry my beliefs too strongly into the conversation. I then find myself too often confusing Conviction with Character and dismiss the other person as either irrelevant or irreverent.
When we stand on what we belief, what we deem "right" behavior. It becomes all too often a passionate barrier to seeing the other person as a credible, kind human being with an equally passionately held belief system.
But I may be wrong..... :)
Ethan, I had another friend reply to me that he thought I was sounding defensive in my last reply.. I truly didn't "feel" defensive when I wrote it and now that I've read it again I still don't feel defensive or offended. If you also felt that way you have my apology and I trust you know we'll be having a good hour long conversation about this next week in our time together! :) Sorry if my reply came across badly..... words on a screen are an unreliable means of communication.... I'm engrossed by your reply/response and I'm wrestling, and have always wrestled with how to hold my own deeply held beliefs in tension while earning other people's trust who profoundly disagree with what I belief.
ReplyDeleteI wrote a response, but it isn't showing up where I can see it... Hey Robert, thanks for responding, and sorry I did not return the same timely favor to you. (Family in this weekend, so not a lot of time on the web) Yeah, I see where you're coming from, and you practice what you preach, as well as having a very clear set of convictions. My concern is that people do not have a firm conviction to many things, rather they follow blindly or do not seek to find things out to a great depth. (I said it better in my first reply, which I hope shows up, but if not that is the heart of what I meant)So, I guess all I'm trying to say is that people should wrestle with their beliefs, and maybe it is the job of people like you (and maybe me) to push them to do such a thing. I know you have helped me to clarify my own beliefs, etc. And maybe you have encountered people with a much deeper sense of belief/ conviction than I have as well.
DeleteAll that to say, I don't think I disagree with you, as much as I think there is another issue that's related that should be discussed.
I had a thought, but it hurt so I stopped...
ReplyDeleteOh yeah! It seems that you are describing the difference between an apologist and an evangelist. An apologist defends the faith, an evangelist spreads the faith.
ReplyDelete